am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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