M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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