she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
