New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
You're like the curious george of whores
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
