he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
MIDGETS
????
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize