yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
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