I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
