i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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