..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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