Don't you send me to vm
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
