How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
