So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize