Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
