Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Send help, water and tortillas.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
