508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
