Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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