woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize