Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
