Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
