tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize