Kiss
Puke
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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