and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
