she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize
