If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Randomize
