Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
