I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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