the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
