I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
