I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
