Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
