Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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