u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
It's never too late to be topless.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
