I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
this is an emotional support booty call
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
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