He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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