you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Are my feet made of real feet?
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
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