Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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