remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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