She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
