I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
