I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
