Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Randomize