You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
