i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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