Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
