Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
