i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
It's Friday. Sex?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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