Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
