We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
