I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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