Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
