they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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